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A Toast to 2014

With only about a day and a half of 2014 left, I can't help but think about what a year this has been.  So much has happened -- I think more so this year than any other year in the past (or so it seems).  I traveled, graduated law school, passed the Maryland Bar Exam, watched some of my best friends marry their best friends, became certified as a spin instructor, went through a rough break up, got sworn in as an attorney in Maryland, started a new job that I love, made new friends, and learned a lot about myself individually ...just to name a few.  Although 2015 probably will not be as eventful academically and professionally, I have no doubt that it will be another fantastic year.  I already have some exciting things planned for the year and I can't wait to get 2015 started!

I thought it would be fun to do a year in review to highlight some of my fondest memories from 2014.  Some of these are all over the place, but I think you'll get the picture: 2014 was an awesome year. 


January kicked off a year of many "lasts" as I started my last semester of law school.  I also picked a New Year's resolution that I probably didn't keep, got asked to be a bridesmaid in my friend Tara's wedding, and took a trip to Miami with one of my best friends to see a great couple tie the knot. 




February was about friends.  I took my friend Megan to her first Washington Capitals hockey game and celebrated my best friend Lauren's quarter of a century birthday in DC.

 



March had another "last:" my last Barrister's Ball (a.k.a. law school prom).  My house also flooded, which I truly believe is something everyone should have to experience at some point in their lives (sorry).




April was a month of some serious soul-searching.  I decided I hated love and swore off relationships forever.  But on a brighter note, I accomplished something I had been working very hard towards for several months: I became a certified spin instructor!




May marked the last of all of my law school obligations.  I took my last law school final and graduated magna cum laude on May 19th.  I also worked my last day at a law firm that I absolutely love, took shots of Jack Daniels with my 88-year-old grandmother, and celebrated love at my friend Allie's bridal shower. 

 




June was challenging.  I began studying tirelessly for the Maryland Bar Exam, and about three weeks in to my eight week course wondered how the hell I was going to survive through the end of July.  Somewhere in between the 15 hours of studying a day I managed to help plan a bridal shower for my dear friend Kelsie.

 



July was even more challenging.  I thought I hit my breaking point with the studying, but that was all over on July 29th & 30th when I took the Bar exam and walked out of the Baltimore Convention Center feeling totally and completely brain dead.  




I can describe August in one word: BUSY.  I pretty much slept and regrouped for the first three or four days of the month and then slowly started to pick up things where I left off pre-Bar studying.  I turned 25, spent a weekend celebrating Allie's last few weeks before saying "I do," and started a new job.  I also stood by Kelsie's side as she married her best friend, and then stood by my friend Kristen's side moments after she said "yes" to the man of her dreams!





September was still busy!  I spent most of my time trying to fix a broken relationship, which proved to be unsuccessful.  I went to the first home Ravens game of the season, treated myself to a new iPhone 6, and then went on quite possibly the most fun bachelorette weekend in history. 

 



October added several wives to my group of friends as I watched Allie and Tara marry two awesome men.  Eric Church stole my heart (as always) at his concert in Philadelphia, and oh yeah, I passed that silly Bar exam. ;)



                                 






November was about thanks.  After thinking about it for several months, I finally started this blog and kicked it off with #20daysofthanks.  I also took a trip with my family to New York for Thanksgiving and was reminded how important my family is. 

                          
                                                                             














December, you have been the best month of 2014 by far.  I have done so many exciting and fun things this month that I can't even attempt to summarize them into one post.  But some highlights: my roommates and I purchased and decorated our first real Christmas tree together, I was sworn in as an attorney (officially) in Maryland, and I watched my Ravens make it to the 2014-15 NFL playoffs live at M&T Bank Stadium in Baltimore!

 



I have two words for 2015 ... GOOD LUCK!  
Cheers to another fantastic year with friends and family!

A Role Model

Happy Monday, friends!!!  On my drive into work this morning, I was thinking about what I wanted to write about on here today.  I considered sharing my awesome weekend spent with my best friend in DC, or maybe posting something about Christmas, or possibly inviting you all to try a new recipe.  But being that it is Monday and the end of 2014 is approaching, I wanted something a little more inspiring.  

One night last week I happened to stumble upon the People Magazine Awards on television.  I am not big into awards shows, but nothing else really was on so I decided to watch the awards for a bit.  Luckily, I caught one of my girl crushes winning Celebrity Role Model of the year: Kate Hudson.  I love so much about Kate Hudson, and listening to her speech made me love her even more.  I think Kate Hudson is such a powerhouse.  She is a talented actress, an awesome mom (at least that's what the tabloids I read lead me to believe), a successful business owner (you HAVE to sign up for her company, Fabletics -- I LOVE the workout gear), she's beautiful, smart, witty, just totally awesome.  I want to be her, can you tell?  Well, she gave one of the best acceptance speeches I think I have heard on a celebrity awards show.  Here it is: Kate Hudson Wins Celebrity Role Model of the Year.

You need to listen to the full speech (it is short), but I will share my thoughts anyways.  

She starts out defining what a "role model" means to her, which actually is what it means to some girl named Natalie who posted her own definition of "role model" somewhere on the Internet: "a role model is a person with a clear sense of what is important to her."  

Kate then goes on to give some pretty inspiring words about this journey we call "life."  Be focused, resilient, fearless.  Don't burden yourself with the pursuit of perfection -- that's unrealistic, she says.  Honor who you are, but more importantly, learn who you are.  Take risks.  And don't ever let anyone push you around.  That, of course, is only a snapshot of all Kate had to say, and I won't ruin the rest of her speech for those who have not watched it yet. 

Her speech made me think: who is my role model?  Or maybe, who are my role modelS?  My parents, of course.  Maybe some of my friends who have it all together (or at least seem like they do).  Maybe a few professors I have had over the years who stood out to me.  I am not entirely sure if I have one role model, because I look to many different people for many different things.  But, if I had to pick just one, my dad is going to take the cake.  Is that cliche?  

Here is one of the many, many reasons why my dad is my role model.  As I have written about before, I have been doing some reeeal serious "soul searching" recently.  My dad has talked me through just about every decision I have had to make recently, whether it is about my job, relationships, finances, friends -- he has heard it all.  Well, about two weeks ago I was really upset and down one night about a slew of things (which he knew about), and I woke up the next morning with this text: 

You know I always look at the bright side of things and this is no exception:  you're 25 years old, debt free, have a good job and better ones lying ahead.  You're single, beautiful, and have great friends.  Life looks good.  Is there a non-bright way of looking at this?

I mean come on, could there have been a better text to cheer me up?  Texts like that are why my dad is [one of] my role model[s].  He is exactly right: he always looks at the positive side of things.  My dad has been through a lot over the years, but he always has maintained the most positive attitude through everything.  He puts just about every single person above himself and goes out of his way to make sure everyone feels that way.  

I imagine if my dad was to win "Celebrity Role Model of the Year," he would deliver a speech similar to Kate Hudson's.  Life is a journey.  There are challenges, setbacks, triumphs, victories, and moments of fear.  But my dad would say you must stay focused throughout all of these.  "Focus on the task at hand," I can hear him saying.  

Kate Hudson's speech was a good reminder to stay strong and determined and to pursue your personal goals.  Be assertive, live fearlessly, and don't ever let anyone hold you back.  

How is that to jump start your Monday?  Cheers, blog world!

Friday Favorites

WOW, what a week this has been!  I have not even had a chance to update anything on here because work has been so busy!  I think people are scrambling to get everything finished up and filed with the courts before the holiday next week, so it has made things extra crazy around here.  At least it has made the week go by pretty quickly.  Fortunately, I have a fun weekend ahead of me followed by only two days of work next week :)  

Here are my five favorite things from this past week:

ONE


On Thursday, I got sworn in as an official member of the Maryland State Bar!!  I have worked so hard for this day and it has seemed like it never would arrive.  As you can tell from the picture, my parents are pretty thrilled as well.  I could not have asked for a better day overall -- we had the ceremony in the morning (I cried), then lunch with my parents and grandparents at a wonderful spot on the Severn River in Annapolis, and then I enjoyed the afternoon running some errands and relaxing.  I am so thankful I got to share this day with my biggest supporters: my family!


TWO


Some new makeup goodies!  I am in love with all three of these items I picked up: They're Real! Push-up Liner by BenefitLip Locked Lucky Lip Stain by Manna, and Perfection Mist Airbrush Foundation by Sephora.  I couldn't pick just one of these as my favorite, so I had to share all three. 


THREE


My extremely thoughtful roommate gave me this card, some chocolates and beautiful flowers to celebrate my swearing in this week.  This card could not have been more appropriate for the occasion!  Never forget: ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!  Go out and do it!


FOUR


This week's favorite song is a little different than others I have posted about, but still good nonetheless.  I hate to say it, but I am a little sick of hearing Christmas carols on the radio nonstop, so I've been shuffling through my iPod songs a bunch this week.  I am not a scrooge, but sometimes the carols get overwhelming.  Check out "Blind Heart" -- I hope you enjoy it!


FIVE


Dry Finishing Spray by Rusk came in my Birchbox this month and I already have used almost the whole bottle.  This spray is perfect -- it locks things in but doesn't make your hair "crunchy" or stiff.  Plus, it smells amazing!  Highly recommend picking up a bottle of this and giving it a try. 

Friday Favorites

This week's favorites are somewhat holiday-themed, as I finally am getting in the Christmas spirit!  I think the fact that Thanksgiving was so late this year threw me off and I didn't even realize how quickly December/Christmas were approaching.  I had a fantastic week this week for so many reasons, and I am excited to share this week's five favorites. 



ONE




Decorating my house with my roommates has been so fun!  I definitely am the least creative out of the three of us, but it was fun to each do a little bit to make our house feel so homey and warm for Christmas.  I won't want to put away all of the decorations at the end of this month!




TWO



A dinner date with my dear friend, Chelsea, and her adorable toddler, Liam (guilty of using an old picture for this favorite).  I met Chelsea during my junior year in college, and she has been a dear friend ever since.  Two years ago, I went to her absolutely beautiful wedding, then watched her become a mom to baby Liam, and now she is expecting their second baby - this time a girl!  Obviously, our days are a little bit different (Liam has a TON of energy and, in Chelsea's words, is a "daredevil"), but that hasn't stopped us from staying friends and hanging out just like old times.  She invited me over for dinner and three hours later we still were chatting away on the couch.  I am so thankful to have such a special friend.




THREE



The Angel Tree Program.  This year, my judge and administrative assistant and I all decided that we would "select" an Angel Family from our courthouse's Angel Tree instead of exchanging gifts between the three of us.  This was music to my ears for several reasons - first of all, buying gifts for your boss and co-workers is nearly impossible; and second, I think programs like this are so important around the holidays.  Usually right around this time of year I start to feel like I have not been charitable enough, and I start rushing around to find some way to give to those in need.  The Angel Tree Program provides clothes, gifts and "wished-for" toys for local families in need.  We picked a family with a 5-year-old girl, Shianayah, who asked Santa for a baby doll and clothes.  I remember how much I loved baby dolls when I was this age, so I had a lot of fun picking one out for her.  This program is really special and I am so glad we chose to participate this year.




FOUR




Gavin DeGraw seemed to take a hiatus from the music world for a bit, so I was thrilled when I heard this new song a couple of weeks ago.  I particularly enjoy playing this song for my Sunday morning spin class.




FIVE


Have you ever shopped at Pink Pineapple Shop?  If not, you MUST go check it out.  I purchased this necklace about two years ago from PPS and always break it out around the holidays (I'll be sporting it tonight to a holiday party).  I love all of the accessories at PPS, AND if you shop on their site today by 5pm this necklace and several others are only $23!!  Check out the awesome sale here.


Here's to kicking off a great weekend ...Cheers!

You Don't Always Have to be Perfect

You don't always have to be perfect.

I repeat: you don't always have to be perfect. 

You have no idea how badly I want to believe in those seven words.  I want to believe in them so so badly.  I want to click my red slipper heels together and say those words over and over again until I sense that they are real. 

I want to be perfect.  I want to be a perfect friend.  I want to be a perfect daughter, granddaughter, niece.  I want to be a perfect co-worker.  A perfect roommate.  A perfect student.  I want to be a perfect listener and a perfect shoulder to cry on.  I want to be a perfect wife and a perfect mother someday.  Really I just want to be a perfect human: the one who does all the right moves, says all the rights things, and always knows the answer. 

But here is the thing: I can't be. 

That is some of the most difficult truth I have had to come to terms with and accept since I turned the ripe old age of 25.  I mean seriously, I have lived 25 years of my life striving to be and thinking I could be perfect, and then suddenly, one fall day, like a ton of bricks it hit me that I just cannot be perfect.  

We spend so much of our lives trying to please others - trying to be perfect for others.  We all want to be the perfect child our parents envisioned, and the perfect student who aced school, the perfect employee or co-worker who everyone can depend on for everything.  It is exhausting.  It is exhausting always trying to be that perfect someone for someone else, rather than trying to be perfect for yourself

Now, perfect for yourself is not perfect.  Whoever told you that "you are perfect just the way you are" was lying to you - you are not perfect.  And you do not need to be.  And that is o-k-a-y. 

Perfect to me meant always being able to do something myself.  It meant I didn't have to ask for help.  It meant that I could bury myself beneath 100+ files at work and get them all done by myself and on time.  Perfect to me meant that I could "overbook" myself on any given day and still manage to come out with some free time.  Perfect to me meant looking the part, talking the part, and of course acting the part. 

I want to be able to help everyone, to save everyone, and to put the world on my back and tell others to get the hell outta my way. 

"I don't need any help," I would think to myself.  But the truth is, I do need the help.  I need so much help, but I just don't know how to ask for it.  Maybe I am too fixed on trying to be that perfect someone for someone else, and asking for even an intimation of help would mean I am not actually perfect.  For so long (just about 25 years to be exact), this felt like defeat to me: if I asked for help it meant I would lose and I wouldn't be perfect because I didn't do it all myself. 

I have spend the last several months trying to be perfect for a certain person.  The ironic thing about this is that I lost myself a bit throughout this process, but I strangely also found myself through it all, too. 

I could have continued trying to be perfect for that certain someone for a lifetime.  I really could have held on for one thousand more years.  But instead, I had to choose (ok, maybe more like force myself) to let go and give myself permission to just be okay with never being perfect for them.  And this is where I learned my most important lesson: just because I can hold on to trying to be perfect for someone else does not mean that I should.  Yeah, good luck convincing yourself of that on the first one hundred tries. 

Here is the thing: we need to stop holding ourselves back from things because we are too focused on striving for perfection.  We need to stop convincing ourselves that we need to be perfect in order to be all the things we want to be in life or accomplish all the goals we set for ourselves.  

Perfection is not the answer; happiness is.

You don't always have to be perfect. 

Reciting those words makes me feel hostile and defensive right away.  But they are true.  They always have been and always will be true. 

So my pity party is over.  I am not the protagonist in some sob story - I am human.  I make mistakes.  I lose (let's not forget that I also win, too!).  I fall down and I let people down.  I let go of people only to realize right away that I actually need them.  I don't have all the answers.  And I know how to mess up. 

I am done always trying to be perfect for someone else.  It is not who I am.  I am the girl ripping shots of Jack Daniels with the guys.  The girl running on two hours of sleep before a final because there just is NO TIME FOR SLEEP WHEN THERE IS SO MUCH LEARNING TO BE DONE.  The girl who stays late at work not necessarily because she needs to, but because she wants to.  The girl who can't really bake because that extra minute in the oven always turns out to be fatal.  The girl who doesn't like to be touched or cuddled.  The competitive one.  The girl who argues for the things that are important and meaningful to her.  The girl who simply cannot stand being late for anything.  The girl who yells when she is mad and upset, and then always regrets it later.  The girl who occasionally cancels plans for no good reason.  The girl who spends her Sundays sporting any amount of Ravens gear and never misses THE BIG GAME.  The one who stays extra time "just to get things organized."  And when I accept all of these things, that is when I am perfect for myself.  Screw trying to be perfect for you, or anyone else. 

You don't always have to be perfect. 

Hey, I think I got it now - I don't always have to be perfect.  Instead, I think I will focus on proving that I am worthwhile.  

Weekend Wrap-Up

What a weekend this was!  Friday night I celebrated the holidays with my fellow group fitness instructors from my gym at Supano's in Baltimore and may have over-served myself slightly ;).  Saturday was filled with helping my good friend Kelsie setup and get organized for her and her husband's first annual holiday party, and then also making an appearance at another friend's holiday party later in the evening.  

I have to compliment Kelsie's party and how spectacular everything was.  She did an amazing job with the decorations, menu, drinks, and really just the overall party.  I of course snapped some pictures of everything she made so I could share her ideas on here in case any of you are planning your very own holiday parties and need some ideas!  Here are some of my favorites:


Their adorably-decorated house

Grinch kabobs - how cute are these?!  A green grape, banana slice and strawberry on a toothpick.  These were supposed to have a mini marshmallow on top of the strawberry as part of the "hat," but we ran out of room on the toothpick putting these together.  Still think they turned out great!

A chili bar, which quickly became the hit of the food table throughout the evening.


Hot chocolate bar with mini marshmallows, candy cane bits, white chocolate chips, and Rumplemintz for those feeling extra adventurous (i.e.: me).  This was my first time adding Rumplemintz to my hot chocolate -- amazing!

Individual cookies & milk on the dessert table

Her place cards, which were three mini candy canes wrapped together with a red ribbon -- so adorable.  Also the reindeer chow was just the standard puppy chow recipe with some red and green m&ms mixed in.


The girls and our very ugly Christmas sweaters


The party was a great time and definitely put me in the Christmas spirit :)  Nothing makes me happier than spending the weekend with great friends and delicious food.  This weekend was full of both, and I'm looking forward to the next few weekends filled with more of the same.  Cheers!

Friday Favorites!

What a crazy week this has been!  Bouncing back after the short week and holiday last week has been difficult, so I am very glad to see Friday afternoon has arrived.  This weekend kicks off several weeks of holiday parties and festivities with friends and family, so it's time to dust off the ugly Christmas sweaters and get in the Christmas spirit!  

Here are my five favorites from the week:


ONE


OPI Malaga Wine gel polish.  I got a manicure with this color about two weeks ago and still am in love with it.  It's a perfect December color!



TWO


REV Cycle Studio in Baltimore.  Some of you may know that I am a spin instructor at a local gym, but I still treat myself to a few classes every now and then at REV.  The studio is awesome and everyone is very friendly.  My personal favorite is "REV Blast" with Candace on Wednesday evenings at 6 p.m.  She's an awesome instructor, and the class will kick your ass -- 45 minutes on the bike, 1-2 tracks with weights for arms/shoulders, and then 15 minutes of core.   I did this class on Wednesday this week and felt incredible afterwards.  If you're around the Baltimore area, give this studio a try!



THREE




I always have a favorite song each week, and this week is "Soul Fight" by The Revivalists.  You may not have heard of this band, and I only was introduced to them a couple of months ago by a friend.  This is a great jam for any kind of mood!




FOUR




Chesapeake Bay Candle Company's three-wick jar candle in fig & currant scent.  This has been burning in my room all week and it smells heavenly!  Everyone loves a great candle :)




FIVE





I guess I loved a lot of local companies this week!  Chesapeake Bay Roasting Company makes amazing coffee and I have been enjoying a can of this all week.  And trust me, I have needed A LOT of coffee to get through this crazy week.  Metropolitan in Federal Hill brews and sells cans of it, so stop on by and pick some up -- you will see why it's so good!


Next week is sure to bring another set of favorites, especially after the holiday parties I have coming up this weekend.  Cheers to a great weekend!

Cider + Whiskey

Like any other basic bitch, one of my favorite things about fall is a fun and festive drink.  Well, I love whiskey, and one of my favorite fall drinks is apple cider, so naturally I decide to mix the two every year right around this time.  Usually, I am perfectly content with cold apple cider with a shot or two of whiskey mixed in, but this Thanksgiving I upped my game a bit.  I traveled to New York for the holiday, and because it was so cold I decided I needed a little something to warm me up!  



If you haven't done so already, here is what you need to do: purchase some fresh apple cider (the good stuff from a local orchard or farm, not any wannabe ciders) and a bottle of Jack Daniels (or, if you're like me, you have three + bottles at your house already), pour a couple cups of the cider in a saucepan, turn on your stove, drop in a cinnamon stick, wait five or so minutes, and mix that with some whiskey in a big mug.

Ok, I promise it's not that complicated, and I know this is no novel idea by any means.  But, I have to say the cinnamon stick really takes the drink to an entirely new level -- absolutely delicious!  I know what I'm drinking this weekend, and I hope you give it a try too!  

Cheers to cider and whiskey!

Grammar Girl

Happy December!!  I know I say it every year, but it really does not seem possible that we are in the last month of 2014.  I am looking forward to so many things this month, and can't wait to end this year on a great note!

This post has nothing to do with December, Cyber Monday sales or pre-Christmas festivities.  Instead, I have decided to write about something that those of you who know me know is very near and dear to my heart: grammar.  Sounds lame I know (I mean, it is), but careless grammatical mistakes drive me NUTS, and if you ever have carried on at least a somewhat significant conversation with me you know I am not afraid to call you out on your errors.

I am a huge fan of the Grammar Girl podcast created by Mignon Fogarty.  She is brilliant and entertaining and knows how to make learning grammar simple and fun.  Her podcast has explored just about every confounding grammatical question you could imagine, but the ones that drive me most insane are not nearly as complex as those that she addresses.  I certainly am no grammar guru by any stretch of the imagination, but I would like to think I know at least a little something about it. 

So, I am listing the top eight grammatical errors that drive me completely crazy (in no particular order), and hopefully you will not make any of these mistakes ever again ...ever.

[Cue super lame blog post]

1. Your/You're

I cannot even believe that this happens.  "Your" = something belongs to you; "You're" = you + are.  Period.  Could it get any more simple?  No, seriously.


2. Splitting Infinitives

Usually, "to" + a verb = an infinitive.  If you put a word between these two components, you have split the infinitive.  

For example, "I hope to quickly finish my assignment" is incorrect.  By placing the adverb "quickly" in between the words "to" and "finish," you have split the infinitive.  Instead, the sentence should read, "I hope to finish my assignment quickly."  

So, as a general rule: keep 'em together - no word should separate the "to" from the simple form of the verb that follows.  Might sound awkward at first, but I promise it gets better.


3. Who's/Whose

Forget any rules you ever learned about apostrophes here.  "Who's" = who + is.  For example, "who's coming to dinner tonight?"  On the other hand, "Whose" references ownership or to whom something belongs: "I have a friend whose car is blue."  Let's get that straight, guys.


4. Quotation Marks and Punctuation

Punctuation, no matter what type, goes INSIDE the quotation marks.  WHY IS THAT SO DIFFICULT TO REMEMBER.


5. It's/Its

This mistake makes me cringe almost as badly as the your/you're tragedy.  "It's" = it + is.  This usually is used when you are describing something.  Conversely, "Its" indicates ownership of something.  

As a simple test, if you can replace the word with another possessive adjective such as "theirs," "his" or "hers," then "its" is the correct one to use.  It's not that difficult of a concept. ;)


6. I/Me

"I" is a subject; "Me" is an object.  You should use "I" when referring to the person performing the action of the verb in your sentence.  However, use "Me" when referring to the person that the action of the verb is being done to.  Whoever taught you that you automatically should use "I" whenever the word "and" connects two subjects or objects was wrong.  You should go back and tell your elementary school teachers that.

I know this explanation seems somewhat confusing and troublesome, so here is the rule I follow when deciding which to use: try out your sentence with either "I" or "me" and see how it sounds.  

For example, "My mom told my sister and (me) to be ready at 8:00."  Does "My mom told I to be ready at 8:00" make any damn sense?  No.  But, "My mom told me to be ready at 8:00" makes perfect sense.  There ya have it, folks. 


7. Must Of/Must Have

If you ever have written "must of" then you are just wrong.  In your defense, you probably are thinking that, because 've sounds very much like "of," you write the commonly spoken word "must've" as "must of."  Well, that's wrong and "must of" is not even a thing.  If you hear "must've" it is short for must + have.  You must've been mistaken if you've ever written "must of." ;)


8. Affect/Effect



"Affect" is a verb and "Effect" is a noun.  There are very few exceptions to this general rule, so they are not worth worrying about.  Use "affect" when talking about influencing or producing a change in something: "A snowstorm can affect my morning commute."  If you are talking about a change that occurred, please for the love of God use "effect:" "A snowstorm has a direct effect on morning traffic." 


So, now you know what drives me mad in conversations.  I also realize I have set the bar pretty high for my posts from here on out - I definitely cannot make any grammatical mistakes now.  Maybe you learned something, maybe you didn't, but in any event please do not make these mistakes when you're talking to me.

Cheers to that!